ED Recovery

Eating disorder recovery, it has always been a hard concept for most to grasp. When I was enmeshed in my sickness, my therapist told me it was possible. It took me a long time to not only believe in a full recovery, but embrace it. I've been asked many times, "How do you know when you're recovered? Is it possible to fully recover?" I've always given the textbook answer...."Recovered = no longer engaging in the behaviors." And I believe in that answer! But now I truly feel it to my core.

When I was entangled in my eating disorder, feeling emotions was not allowed. The eating disorder thrived in states of emotional chaos and misery. The eating disorder was my drug of choice. With either restriction or unhealthy exercise, I was able to not only numb myself from pain but also punish myself for not being the perfect person that I thought I wanted to be and what I thought others expected from me. It was not o.k. for me to make a mistake. I wouldn't be accepted; I'd be judged. Would anyone like me or even love me if I messed up? Would they go away?

This weekend I found myself faced with a very emotional, stressful situation in which I felt lost, sad, vulnerable and weak. That makes for very fertile ground for an eating disorder. Did the eating disorder noise surface? Yes indeed it did! Restrict, restrict, restrict...run, run, run...isolate, isolate, isolate! It was there! I hadn't heard it in a while; it's been quiet, very distant for me. And yes, in the moments of my weakness and sadness, I was tempted by it. I was beating myself up, wanting to punish myself for not being o.k., for messing up. With the very little strength that I had, I had to dig deep and connect with my healthy soul self. I was not going to allow the eating disorder to lure me back into the box of misery and sickness. Knowing that I could not do it alone, I reached out to friends, very good friends who love me unconditionally. My strength and their love was nourishment for my healthy self. I could have numbed out and isolated, that's what the eating disorder wants to have happen. But that means numbing out from life which is no longer a path I want to go down. Feeling the pain and sadness hurt to the core. But I'd rather feel than hide because that means I'm truly alive and present in my life. I'm showing up for all of it, the good and the bad!

Was it a test? No, it was life! Life is going to go on with ups and downs. But for me, it was an opportunity to not only affirm my belief in a full recovery, but live it!
So, will the textbook answer to that question be sufficient...Yes! But now with honesty and my most authentic self I will say it with more conviction. I know it to be true! I experienced it, I felt it and I survived it!
And YES, I have RECOVERED from my eating disorder!!!

My Interview

I have never felt more satisfied and honored as a dietitian as I do now. My personal journey has led me to this amazing place of passion and gratitude for the work that I now do. It's a dream come true. I am living with intention; creating the professional and personal life I have always wanted.

Please enjoy this video. It was a great honor and privilege to do this interview with Lise for Chico and the surrounding communities.
http://vimeo.com/11215851

Far away.....there in the sunshine.....are my highest aspirations. I may not be able to reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them and try to follow them.
Louisa May Alcott

It's YOUR Body

• Appreciate your body. Celebrate all of the amazing things your body does for you like walking and dancing, breathing, laughing, BEING!
• Re-connect with yourself and toss out that modesty, make a list of things you like about yourself that aren’t necessarily related to your body but you as a whole person. Read your list often and add to it as you become aware of more and more things that you like about yourself.
• Remind yourself that “true beauty” is not simply skin-deep. When you feel good about yourself and who you are, you carry yourself with a sense of confidence, self-acceptance, and openness that radiates beauty. Beauty is a state of mind, not a state of your body.
• Look at yourself as a whole person: mind, body and spirit!
• Exercise for the joy of feeling your body move and grow stronger. Allow your body the freedom to participate in activities that feel good.
• Surround yourself with outgoing, positive people. It is easier to feel good about yourself and your body when you are around others who are supportive and who love you just as you are.
• Silence those negative thoughts that may pop up telling you that your body is not “good enough”. You can overpower those thoughts with positive self talk. Give voice back to your healthy soul self that loves and appreciates your body.
• Wear clothes that fit comfortably and support you in feeling self-assured and at ease with your body.
• Be kind to yourself. Do something nice for yourself and your body like a relaxing bubble bath, afternoon nap or soothing massage.
• Treat your body with the kindness and respect it deserves. Feed it, keep it active and listen to its wants and needs. It is the vehicle that will carry you through this amazing life you have the opportunity to live.

NEDA/EDAP

Out with the Old and In with the new YOU

Strict meal plans, calorie counts, weekly weights and food logs. How many of you have been told what to eat, how much to eat and when to eat? And in the words of Dr. Phil McGraw, “So, how’s that working for you?” Diets simply do not work. They erode self -trust, self-esteem and self-love. Too often I’ve witnessed my clients blaming themselves for their diet failures but they did not fail, it was the process of dieting that failed them.
So having said that, when you hear the word DIET, what do you think? What feelings come up? Have your experiences with diets damaged your self trust? Are you on a diet now?
How does dieting make you feel mentally, physically and emotionally?
Personally, I hate the word! And quite frankly I can’t stand that its part of my title, Registered Dietitian.

We were all born with the internal knowledge of listening, trusting and responding to our body's needs. Over time because of outside influences those innate signals get lost and we are subjected to societal pressures of “dieting”. As a Nutrition Therapist, I want to help people retrieve those internal signals of hunger, fullness and food preferences. It’s time to give the intuitive eater within all of us back its voice; to reconnect with our mind, body and eating in a healthy, trusting way. Practice intuitive eating and allow your body to find its comfortable, healthy, desirable weight. Trust in your internal wisdom and listen to your body’s signals, I have no doubt that you will be happy and present in your life as an intuitive eater.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year! It's that time of the year again when everyone is making their new year's resolutions with the most common of all being weight loss. From exercise equipment, gym memberships and diet programs, we're surrounded by the pressures of weight loss marketing and media influence. But consider this, how many pieces of exercise equipment have you purchased but only used a few times? How many diets have you tried and disliked because you felt miserably restricted? Did you join the gym because you "should" but dreaded going?

I'd like to support and encourage everyone to seek lasting overall health this year, mind, body and soul. Connect with yourself by appreciating and accepting your body. Move your body in a way that not only brings you enjoyment but energy and inner peace. Instead of restriction or dieting, develop a healthy relationship with food by practicing intuitive eating. Listen and respond kindly to your body's hunger and fullness, wants and needs. And finally, re-connect with your spirit and healthy soul self, that part of you that wants to live and be free every moment of every day.

No number on a scale, fad diet or strenuous exercise program will deliver the healing, long lasting happiness that self love and acceptance will. So throw out those superficial resolutions and resolve to be present in your life this year and always.